No See!

If time is money it sure did cost me a lot to re-lace my freshly washed two day dried tennies this morning. I've had them for several years and all of that time I had used only ten of the twenty eyelets that are available. That worked just fine but I've always had too much shoestring and have always had to double bow it. This morning I decided to use the other eyelets hoping to cut my bows in half. How in the hell do you lace shoes with twenty eyelets and why would you want twenty? I should have just bought shorter shoestrings! I'm thinking I'll need to buy new shoestrings soon anyway because I almost wore one of them out this morning lacing and unlacing so many times as I spent about thirty minutes trying to figure out how they should be laced. The last attempt I left in. Because of my huge belly I decided that if I refrain from taking long steps I'll never see them again anyway except when I put the shoes on or take them off. Other folks I know will probably never notice either because most never look at me anyway. If they should they would never look lower than my big gut.

Last Sunday I decided I didn't want to shave anymore so a beard was in the making. After about four days I was looking pretty ragged but I was sure it would take shape soon. Glenda had been on my case about it everyday. Ruthie came over Thursday to visit and wouldn't even give me a hug because I looked so terrible. She and Glenda together made several nasty comments in regard to the four day growth. They decided to hit the grocery store in Eldon before the weekend madness started so they took off. While they were gone I went in and shaved the dam thing off. Can you believe neither one noticed the clean look when they returned? After Ruthie left, Glenda and I ate a little supper and I waited for her to notice. After she had been home a couple of hours I gave up and while actually in her face had to point it out to her....She was looking right into my face and didn't notice it until I told her! I'm never going to shave again! I wonder if it could be something about my big mouth that keeps people from looking at me?

At the feast of ego everyone leaves hungry.