Gosh my muddled mind seems to be drowning any thought I might have had this morning. No surprise there when you realize that 70% of the brain is water. One can lose a pint or more water from his body everyday just by breathing. I guess it's possible that I've breathed a lot of my mind away and the coffee wasn't accepted as replacement. Wish I could teach my breathing where to collect the water it exhales. What with 50% of fat being water, I could breath away a couple pounds a day.
Looks like we're all nothing much more than a walking water bucket. Giving that a little thought I realize that over the years I have seen some awfully good looking buckets of water.
Anyway, my water makes up about 19.2 square feet of my body or almost 100 pounds. Humm, if I can't breath it off, maybe full time pissed off would help.
This brings to mind another little tidbit, circumcision removes and throws away as much as 15 square inches of very erogenous tissue. This loss could possibly allow one a small bit of extra time to devote to other matters and might help explain why Jewish men and others are such good money makers.
"The management of fertility is one of the most important functions of adulthood." - Germaine Greer
About Me
Friday, August 31, 2012
Sunday, May 06, 2012
5/3
I kinda remember as a tot, wishing I was six so I could go to school with my older sister and brother.
At six I wished to be 10 thinking I could be as smart as my sister.
At ten I wished I was sixteen so I could drive a car and be as cool as my older brother.
At sixteen I wished to be 21 so I could become an official adult.
At fifty I wished I was thirty nine and at 60 almost had the same wish but had talked myself into accepting forty nine wish.
Now here, I'm so thankful to have made seventy that all those stupid time wasting wishes have moved on out, never to be again. They were crowded out by a huge chunk of hope.
I hope a make it to seventy one. I hope a make it to seventy two. I hope a make it to seventy three.
Isn't a living human life a deal? Life is but a dream sweetheart, sweetheart. Life is but a dream sweetheart.
At six I wished to be 10 thinking I could be as smart as my sister.
At ten I wished I was sixteen so I could drive a car and be as cool as my older brother.
At sixteen I wished to be 21 so I could become an official adult.
At fifty I wished I was thirty nine and at 60 almost had the same wish but had talked myself into accepting forty nine wish.
Now here, I'm so thankful to have made seventy that all those stupid time wasting wishes have moved on out, never to be again. They were crowded out by a huge chunk of hope.
I hope a make it to seventy one. I hope a make it to seventy two. I hope a make it to seventy three.
Isn't a living human life a deal? Life is but a dream sweetheart, sweetheart. Life is but a dream sweetheart.
4/20
As I sit here trying to come up with a little tale to tell, my ignorant mind stumbled over the word tail. With that word I got to thinking how close it was to be something coming from a butt-hole. I've noticed that a good one can be used as cover for a butt-hole and all that got me wondering where and how the word tale originated. Don't know that I want to use it anymore.
A half hearted attempt to look it up gave me no help but I think it must have come from how you go about telling someone something. Once in a while you tell someone something it can be said they've been told but other times when you tell something it's gets said you told a tale.
Oh just forget it! This butt-hole is now finished with this tale-tail or whatever. I knew I was pretty well finished before I started but it's hard to stop a leak and my poor old mind is cursed with a pretty constant leak as I'm sure most of you all well know.
You know it seems that death is always hanging around just looking for a way in. You certainly don't want to take a chance of providing that opening by being negligent in taking your prescribed medications, especially those for high blood pressure! Being negligent can increases greatly the chance of your tale being told prematurely.
Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome. -Isaac Asimov
A half hearted attempt to look it up gave me no help but I think it must have come from how you go about telling someone something. Once in a while you tell someone something it can be said they've been told but other times when you tell something it's gets said you told a tale.
Oh just forget it! This butt-hole is now finished with this tale-tail or whatever. I knew I was pretty well finished before I started but it's hard to stop a leak and my poor old mind is cursed with a pretty constant leak as I'm sure most of you all well know.
You know it seems that death is always hanging around just looking for a way in. You certainly don't want to take a chance of providing that opening by being negligent in taking your prescribed medications, especially those for high blood pressure! Being negligent can increases greatly the chance of your tale being told prematurely.
Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome. -Isaac Asimov
3/25
Working on a new multi-fuel engine concept for a small scooter. There are many technicalities to work out including a name for the beauty. It is possible that the complete idea will end up flushed but I'm hoping it will be me that ends up flush.....err, I think.
It is going to be powered by methane and gasoline. We'll run a tube from the fuel calibrator to a gallon gas tank, then another to a small methane holding tank. From that, a tube up to a hole in the middle of the seat.
Preparation for a trip should begin the night before by filling the gas tank and consuming a large meal of cooked cabbage, pinto beans along with a few raw onions on the side. After the meal a good snack of roasted peas is suggested which could possibly increase the octane.
When you take off you may need to run on gasoline for a short period until the methane builds up then that will take over. If the methane begins to poop out the gas will cut in and run until the methane is again adequate for the job.
I can hear me going down the road now, putt, putt, putt, poot, poot, putt, putt, poot, poot, poot, putt, putt, putt.
Another obstacle to overcome is the riders probable desire to save gasoline which could have him straining somewhat to keep the methane level high enough. Too much effort could have him shittin and gettin down the road on gasoline.
I'm thinking about applying or a twenty nine million dollar, more or less, grant to help me get this thing on the road and believe a good name for it might help. A few has been suggested but I am open for more. A few ideas so far; 'Gas-a-go-go', 'Sit and Git', 'Buttrun Piston Popper', 'Grunt and Go', 'Smart Fart' and then my favorite, 'Poop De Ville'.
Oh well, like I said, it may not come to any real deal and all the time spent on it so far could be only a down the drain waste.
Waste kinda makes you think of the time you spent reading this huh?
It is going to be powered by methane and gasoline. We'll run a tube from the fuel calibrator to a gallon gas tank, then another to a small methane holding tank. From that, a tube up to a hole in the middle of the seat.
Preparation for a trip should begin the night before by filling the gas tank and consuming a large meal of cooked cabbage, pinto beans along with a few raw onions on the side. After the meal a good snack of roasted peas is suggested which could possibly increase the octane.
When you take off you may need to run on gasoline for a short period until the methane builds up then that will take over. If the methane begins to poop out the gas will cut in and run until the methane is again adequate for the job.
I can hear me going down the road now, putt, putt, putt, poot, poot, putt, putt, poot, poot, poot, putt, putt, putt.
Another obstacle to overcome is the riders probable desire to save gasoline which could have him straining somewhat to keep the methane level high enough. Too much effort could have him shittin and gettin down the road on gasoline.
I'm thinking about applying or a twenty nine million dollar, more or less, grant to help me get this thing on the road and believe a good name for it might help. A few has been suggested but I am open for more. A few ideas so far; 'Gas-a-go-go', 'Sit and Git', 'Buttrun Piston Popper', 'Grunt and Go', 'Smart Fart' and then my favorite, 'Poop De Ville'.
Oh well, like I said, it may not come to any real deal and all the time spent on it so far could be only a down the drain waste.
Waste kinda makes you think of the time you spent reading this huh?
3/9/2012
After cultivating a beard for about 10 weeks I decided to shave it off. Talked with Dory about it and she told me it didn't make her any difference either way. Just do whatever I wanted. So yesterday, after she left to play bridge at the Lions Club, I shaved it off. When she got home we talked for a little bit then she went in to check things out on her computer. It sure made me feel very very insignificant when she didn't notice that I had shaved. I finally realized that when she said that it didn't make her any difference, it meant it damn sure didn't make her any difference! I went in later and mentioned that I had shaved and as she looked at me she weakly said that she had noticed something was different but didn't know what. Guess I'll let it grow back out. I liked the no shaving everyday big time.
Despite the old saying, 'Don't take your troubles to bed', many men still sleep with their wives!~Andy Rooney
Despite the old saying, 'Don't take your troubles to bed', many men still sleep with their wives!~Andy Rooney
Sunday, March 04, 2012
3/4/12
A short time ago Glenda called down the stairs to tell me breakfast was ready. Whoopee! I was kinda hungry so I dropped everything I was doing and took the stairs two at a time. Rushed to the table only to discover a bare-assed bowl, a spoon beside it, the milk jug and a box of Cheerios. The disappointment put me so low it took three tries to jump up into my chair at the table. All I can say is it was a good thing I was hungry. I know, I know, I can fix my own breakfast in the future.
Glenda doesn't like me cooking or fixing things in the kitchen because as she say's, I'm too messy. She has always told me that she would rather do the cooking than clean up the mess after I cook. So before this morning I wasn't too sure that I could fix my own breakfast but after speaking a 70 year developed opinion of the offered, and then sitting there listening to her response for the rest of the mealxxxxx eating time, I definitely know now that I can fix my own breakfast and as things now stand, I may be able to do my lunch and dinner too.
Some of Glenda's blasts of anger last two or three days while others just an hour or two. I'm full of hope that this burst will be one of the latter. I'm pretty full of Cheerios too, as I ate a lot more than I really wanted in an attempt to show her how much I liked them after all.
Yep, I'm full of it and the way things played out around here this morning tho, I'm not that fond of golf it sounds like I may be forced to play more of it! Sure hope it can become enjoyable because I'm thinking golf may need to become my only relaxing outlet. Yes, I've about checked out and read near all of the interesting books at the Eldon Library.
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"Golf and sex are about the only things you can enjoy without being good at."~Jimmy Demaret:
Glenda doesn't like me cooking or fixing things in the kitchen because as she say's, I'm too messy. She has always told me that she would rather do the cooking than clean up the mess after I cook. So before this morning I wasn't too sure that I could fix my own breakfast but after speaking a 70 year developed opinion of the offered, and then sitting there listening to her response for the rest of the mealxxxxx eating time, I definitely know now that I can fix my own breakfast and as things now stand, I may be able to do my lunch and dinner too.
Some of Glenda's blasts of anger last two or three days while others just an hour or two. I'm full of hope that this burst will be one of the latter. I'm pretty full of Cheerios too, as I ate a lot more than I really wanted in an attempt to show her how much I liked them after all.
Yep, I'm full of it and the way things played out around here this morning tho, I'm not that fond of golf it sounds like I may be forced to play more of it! Sure hope it can become enjoyable because I'm thinking golf may need to become my only relaxing outlet. Yes, I've about checked out and read near all of the interesting books at the Eldon Library.
---------------------------------------------------------------
"Golf and sex are about the only things you can enjoy without being good at."~Jimmy Demaret:
1/21/2012
What a difference a day makes. Now who ever said that? Today has started out just like yesterday and the day before that and quite a few before those. A day older and deeper in debt could make the days a little different but that is the same everyday too.
A very limited income makes for a pretty hard way to get along. The only good thing about being old is the Social Security check every month. It's a good thing they send it direct to the bank because it isn't large enough to stand in line for. I don't mean to complain! It does help us a whole bunch. Every little bit counts.
I've learned over the years that when you get a little, enjoy it to the fullest, because it might be some time before any comes around again. That also works with money.
According to Benjamin Franklin we can still be happy and might even be happier because we get so very little. He said, "Money never made a man happy yet, nor will it. There is nothing in its nature to produce happiness. The more a man has, the more he wants. Instead of its filling a vacuum, it makes one. If it satisfies one want, it doubles and trebles that want another way." This quote is another that we'll never be able to disprove so we just accept it and continue worrying on down the road of our lives, hoping that the price for crushed aluminum cans increases before we get another bag ready to sell.
Worry is just about one of the most senseless things that a person can do. I believe in thinking about things but it has got to be in a realistic manner and with an accepting attitude. When you think about it adding negative thoughts, it is called worry. What the hell am I talking about? I'm beginning to worry me!
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A couple is lying in bed. The man says, "I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world." The woman says..... "I'll miss you."
A very limited income makes for a pretty hard way to get along. The only good thing about being old is the Social Security check every month. It's a good thing they send it direct to the bank because it isn't large enough to stand in line for. I don't mean to complain! It does help us a whole bunch. Every little bit counts.
I've learned over the years that when you get a little, enjoy it to the fullest, because it might be some time before any comes around again. That also works with money.
According to Benjamin Franklin we can still be happy and might even be happier because we get so very little. He said, "Money never made a man happy yet, nor will it. There is nothing in its nature to produce happiness. The more a man has, the more he wants. Instead of its filling a vacuum, it makes one. If it satisfies one want, it doubles and trebles that want another way." This quote is another that we'll never be able to disprove so we just accept it and continue worrying on down the road of our lives, hoping that the price for crushed aluminum cans increases before we get another bag ready to sell.
Worry is just about one of the most senseless things that a person can do. I believe in thinking about things but it has got to be in a realistic manner and with an accepting attitude. When you think about it adding negative thoughts, it is called worry. What the hell am I talking about? I'm beginning to worry me!
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A couple is lying in bed. The man says, "I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world." The woman says..... "I'll miss you."
1/20/2012
Wednesday my walk began at a 10* temperature with a 4* wind chill factor. When the walk was over it was up to 12* with a 6* wind chill factor.
As I walked along the cold and wind contrived to flush my tear ducts out and did a pretty good job at that. Somewhere along the walk I began hearing a pretty faint tinkle tinkle sound. I checked my pockets and found nothing that could generate that sound but as I was looking down at the stuff in my hand I saw several tears fall from my face and as they fell the froze only to burst with a faint tinkle as they hit the ground. Mystery solved!
This morning it was up to 19* with a wind chill factor of 9*. A lot better and I'm thinking the tear ducts were near empty from Wednesday's dumping.
As I walked along the cold and wind contrived to flush my tear ducts out and did a pretty good job at that. Somewhere along the walk I began hearing a pretty faint tinkle tinkle sound. I checked my pockets and found nothing that could generate that sound but as I was looking down at the stuff in my hand I saw several tears fall from my face and as they fell the froze only to burst with a faint tinkle as they hit the ground. Mystery solved!
This morning it was up to 19* with a wind chill factor of 9*. A lot better and I'm thinking the tear ducts were near empty from Wednesday's dumping.
1/11/12
I sure do like my daily walks. About an hour and a half of free thought time as amazing as it is no thought is required to move your feet and legs down the road. Can't say all the things me mind plays with as I walk along but one of this morning's thoughts is below.
As a man ages he gains knowledge and with that comes a constant adjusting of priorities of his thoughts. You can tell when a man is getting way along in years when his mind begins to dwell on 'our God in heaven' more than it does on 'a little sex on earth'!
A trip to Osage Bitch is on our list for today. Need to pick up a few things and might even eat out if we can come up with enough moola. A dollar double cheese and a dollar order of fries with water to drink doesn't sound like much but when you add the damn tax to the bill it all adds up big time.
I did try talking Dory in hitch hiking to and fro but she flatly refused to attempt it. It's just as well since traffic out here in the sticks is pretty sporadic anyway. My goodness, if we could ever get there no telling when we might get back.
The future is something which everyone reaches at the rate of sixty minutes an hour, whatever he does, whoever he is and whether he likes it or not.~C. S. Lewis
As a man ages he gains knowledge and with that comes a constant adjusting of priorities of his thoughts. You can tell when a man is getting way along in years when his mind begins to dwell on 'our God in heaven' more than it does on 'a little sex on earth'!
A trip to Osage Bitch is on our list for today. Need to pick up a few things and might even eat out if we can come up with enough moola. A dollar double cheese and a dollar order of fries with water to drink doesn't sound like much but when you add the damn tax to the bill it all adds up big time.
I did try talking Dory in hitch hiking to and fro but she flatly refused to attempt it. It's just as well since traffic out here in the sticks is pretty sporadic anyway. My goodness, if we could ever get there no telling when we might get back.
The future is something which everyone reaches at the rate of sixty minutes an hour, whatever he does, whoever he is and whether he likes it or not.~C. S. Lewis
1/10/2012
You don't need a gun to shoot the breeze but your mind needs ammunition to arm your mouth or fingers for the shot. Some of the material for the ammo can be bought or it can come from down home stuff. Either way the mind has got to hand load the materials into the projectile to make it useable. I haven't been out to buy any materials and I'm thinking, as I sit here, that my home obtained materials must have been wet because I can't get the fingers to fire again this morning. I've spent several seconds here trying, but I can't get it to shoot across this page. That means you don't need to be looking for the 'shot heard around the world' again today.
Too bad, are some of the things in this world but I tend to agree with you that this isn't one of them. Maybe we should even add it to our blessings when we count them.
If you don't have a sense of humor, you probably don't have any sense at all.
Too bad, are some of the things in this world but I tend to agree with you that this isn't one of them. Maybe we should even add it to our blessings when we count them.
If you don't have a sense of humor, you probably don't have any sense at all.
12/25/2011
On my walk this A.M. I come upon this guy at the mailboxes on Y19K. The car had a very loud muffler and the first time I heard it I thought it sounded like it came out of our road then drove on toward the point but not all the way. Heard it come back and stop somewhere ahead of me. Topped the hill and found this kid looking in a mailbox. I yelled "what the hell you doing" and he quickly jumped into his car and sped off. I continued on my walk and about 1/2 down the road near Eagle drive I found a card and envelope laying in the ditch. Picked it up and discovered it belonged in one of the boxes on Y19K. Put the card back into what was left of the envelope and carried it back and put it in the correct box. Checked a lot of the other boxes and found stealable things but believe he took off before getting to them.
No doubt the first time I heard his car was when he was driving away from checking our mailboxes......
Anyway, I reported it to the Sheriff's office and was told a deputy would be by to look at the worthless pictures I took.
JUST KEEPING YOU POSTED.
No doubt the first time I heard his car was when he was driving away from checking our mailboxes......
Anyway, I reported it to the Sheriff's office and was told a deputy would be by to look at the worthless pictures I took.
JUST KEEPING YOU POSTED.
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